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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She's free to not do the same sexual acts with her husband. He's free to leave the marriage. Easy. And that's not rape. That's a choice. [/quote]

I'm the poster who who noted the hate towards women up thread, and this is what I'm talking about: this reductionist view of women than distills them down to their sexuality and nothing else. Do I give OP a pass? Of course not. OP's behavior, if she's real, was reckless, hurtful, and likely, fatal. Let's face it…a multi-year affair with a period of live-in time with affair partner is likely the death knell for that marriage. A scenario in which they could recover from this level of betrayal involves acknowledgement of the DH's hurt and anger, remorse on the part of OP, and sure, details of her relationship with OM. Yes to all of that. But this insistence that offering her husband complete sexual license of her body as a road back to forgiveness is harmful to both parties. It's also likely to be ineffective. The graphic, imagined scenarios between OP and OM described up thread (I'm looking at you, Centurion), are about two things: sex and anger. Put those concepts together and you get violence. And that's what much of this thread smacks of. It's not about defending infidelity. It's about rejecting hatred.[/quote]

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