Reply to What would be the minimum frequency of sex to stay in your relationship / marriage?

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[quote=Anonymous]There is no marital obligation to have sex when you don't want to. There used to be, but then states changed rape laws to include nonconsensual sex even within a marriage. Also with the advent of no-fault divorce, there are no longer laws about "conjugal alienation". Even in states with at fault divorce, you will not find courts granting divorces on the basis of one partner refusing to have sex with the other. This is not how it works anymore. People get to decided whether they want to have sex and there's no legal obligation to do it, even with your spouse.

You can have the expectation that your partner have sex with you at a certain frequency all through your marriage, just like you can have the expectation that your partner earn a certain amount of money within your marriage. But it's not legally required, and if you become dissatisfied you can't compel your spouse to do what you want by pointing to your marriage vows.

You can cry about this is you want but the mature thing to do is just discuss your expectations with any potential marriage partner and don't get married unless you are on the same page. And also prepare to get divorced if their attitude changes and diverges from yours, which happens because it's very hard for someone at age 30 to predict what their sex drive will look like at 50. Good luck to you.[/quote]

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