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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op, i get your frustration. The situation doesn’t make sense to me either and your mother could end up living years more in the nursing home. They tend to prolong the low-quality, end-of-life years that wear loved ones out, even when you like/love the person, which you and some siblings don’t.

What about continuing with this for another six months and if things are going smoothly with Mom in the nursing home, asking your siblings to re-evaluate if Larla’s daily visits are still necessary and if dropping to 2 times/week would be enough? The current situation doesn’t have to be set in stone forever. [/quote]

+1.  Emotions are no doubt high right now, I would punt any decisions to a few months down the line once things have sttled down.[/quote]

This is exactly what I'm doing.  I will admit that I was taken aback by how quickly my sister as that we continue contributing[b] "the same amounts" [/b]that we all already have been almost immediately after telling us she had taken the decision, finally, to move our mother from rehab where she is now to the nursing home instead of back to her home.  I mean, it was the second sentence in her "announcement."  And of course she knows--everyone knows--[b]that 50 percent of the total comes from me[/b].  So, I don't know, I guess I kinda chafed a bit . . . .[/quote]

Transparency is really important in cases like this. Just say great; when you get a chance can I see the spreadsheet to go over everything?[/quote]

I appreciate what you're saying but that's neither the point nor how our family operates.  I have no doubt that my sister will use the money exactly as she says she would and isn't skimming off the top or whatever.  I trust her completely.  The issue is whether what she says she will do with the money is necessary.  Again, we paid it before because my sister couldn't visit every day but wanted our mother at home and the woman clearly needed daily visits.  But now she won't be at home and will have daily care . . . [/quote]

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