Reply to My ADHD husband lets me down in every single possible logistical situation. Anyone else in a similar boat?

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Reply to "My ADHD husband lets me down in every single possible logistical situation. Anyone else in a similar boat?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have ADHD and am in charge of all of this stuff.  Honestly, it doesn’t all get done and life goes on.  Kids show up in uniforms on school picture day.  I get an email from the school nurse and have to run kids to the drug store after school to get vaccines.  Just this past weekend, I had a kid miss a rehearsal for the school play.  I feel like I can keep on top of 90% of it (vet for the dog, meds, doctors, dentist, orthodontist, activity fees, mandatory volunteer hours, lacrosse sticks, mouthguards, what day the gym uniform needs to be clean, taxes, oil changes, ingredients for breakfast lunch and dinner, etc.), but the 10% I miss always feels like a failure.

It sucks, and I hate myself for it.  I’m glad my spouse doesn’t hate me too.  [/quote]

You have ADHD but still manage to do 90% of everything? That’s incredible. Most people are like OP’s husband. They do 0% of everything. Often less than zero because they also can’t take care of themselves. [/quote]

I have ADHD and can accomplish a lot when the need/motivation is extrinsic. I suck at doing things for myself.

For example, I can get the tax documents together, hire people to fix things (get quotes, do research on the project, review the quotes, etc), and client work. However, doing "work" that benefits me personally can be a lot harder for me to get done.

The meds help to a certain degree.

[/quote]

Which part(s) of the process are you doing versus a coworker or roommate or spouse or parent telling you to:

1- independently identify something in need / needs to be done

2- independently make a sensible plan to handle it

3- independently handle it correctly, the first time.

All of those steps? 
Or just the last one? Or the first one? [/quote]

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