Reply to Dealing with GF who is a widow vs. divorced and her kids/my kids/grandkids

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Reply to "Dealing with GF who is a widow vs. divorced and her kids/my kids/grandkids"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So my dad is a version of OP and I’m going to extend my personal thanks to him because this thread encouraged me to stand up to my Dad. I’m the poster upthread whose dad is on his third wife and has always prioritized his partners over his first set of kids. I am the only one of his kids to become a parent, and sometimes he will randomly decide that he wants to have a relationship with my daughter who is a tween. This week, he decided that he wants them to do simultaneous cooking lessons together and FaceTime while doing it on a school night. Before, I would have tried to make this work because he has always given me so little of himself. This time I put my foot down. I said Dad, I am really glad that you want to connect with Larla. But I am already an overwhelmed parent with a tween and school nights are too stressful for us. We want to see you more often, so come visit us. You can come anytime you want and we will welcome you and make the time. And you know what? He’s going to. We put a date on the calendar for next month. I’m really glad that I advocated for myself and that he accepted. If he had declined or left me on read, I wasn’t going to make any further effort and it simply would’ve been his loss. I love him, but I’m not going to chase him anymore. It just doesn’t work.

[b]This is how relationship stay intact OP. Take a note.[/b][/quote]

I think the problem is that the most important relationship to OP is with his girlfriend.  Not his kids, not his grandkids.  And he sees nothing wrong with this.  He's simply annoyed his kids/grandkids aren't "warm" with the girlfriend, and they don't seem to accept that of course dad's new bedpartner is the priority.

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