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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think most people over 50 would marry if they met the right person, but that "the right person" is much more narrowly defined.

People make more compromises when they marry younger because the benefits to marriage are more obvious. If you want kids, marriage is a much more desirable setting for them than having them on your own or in a non marital relationship. There are huge financial benefits to marriage if you are still working on building wealth and maybe still working up to home ownership, especially if you are both working full time (though if family oriented, there can still be financial efficiencies to marriage even if you only have one income). Marriage also serves important social functions during this phase in life, creating networks that help with careers, social supports, and child rearing.

Once you are over 50, a lot of those goals are no longer relevant. So people are less willing to make major compromises in order to combine their lives with someone, even someone they really love. Where a 32 year old might be willing to move to another city, deal with difficult ILs, or put up with a demanding job in order to marry someone they want to start a family and build a life with, a 52 year old is far less likely to be willing to make those concessions.

It's not about thinking your life is over at 50 or that people no longer want love or sex or companionship. It's that marriage is about much more than love/sex/companionship (it's about money and kids and creating a single household), and those things are either less appealing or less important to people 50+.[/quote]

Compatibility is so much harder in middle age. I am 43. I’m not concerned about 50. I date guys 10 years younger and 10 years older. The problem is when you’re older there’s less wiggle room in terms of lifestyle, at least if you have kids from a previous marriage. There’s not time to start over so I want someone who has a career and savings of his own (as do I). He has to be emotionally mature enough to be with not only me, but with my kids. No man-babies. I didn’t know how to spot them when I was in my 20s but I can catch them very quickly now. And it’s a turn off so even if I could put up with them for a fling it’s just not attractive.

That being said, my libido is super high and with the right man I am having the best sex of my whole life and it keeps getting better.[/quote]

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