Reply to I told husband I might want a divorce

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Having a new baby in the home is tough.
 
Yet your husband appears to not want his own life to change because of it - - sounds like he doesn’t like the changes that accompany becoming first-time parents.

You are not wrong in your feelings &gt; or in your assessment of your marriage.
Your husband needs to step up to the plate NOW.

He wanted this new family dynamic too……[/quote]

OP, my heart breaks for you. This PP is right- your DH is living in a fantasy world where he thinks he can just go back to the way things were if he acts like things haven’t changed.

Mine was like this and it escalated to him just disappearing to a hotel for 4 days when DD was 10 weeks old. He wouldn’t tell me what hotel or when he was returning, and it was also a time when money was tight. I longed for a quiet night away or an hour off and still cannot believe his selfishness in doing that.

At the time I did not have the financial means to leave, but I think about that time often and have kept in mind the fact that I cannot rely on nor trust him. It was tragic and sad but it’s also freeing to know that you are on your own.

My DH thinks he’s a big family guy but DD is now old enough to make her own choices and mostly avoids him and also knows he’s unreliable. I feel badly for her that I chose so poorly but I am glad that I took over rather than wait for DH to step up.

In my experience, if they don’t step up when everything is new and special and all eyes are on them, they never will. So now you know who your DH is. Get brave and rely only on yourself, divorce or no divorce.[/quote]

Why did you stay in this terrible marriage? Your daughter's behavior towards him is a clear sign that she would have been happier if you had divorced. I'm sure at some level Your daughter is judging you that you never have the strength courage to do it What needed to be done.[/quote]

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