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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This thread has so many messy af women in it... If you flip the genders, you'd be screaming about how rapey he was for trying to force her into something he didn't want, and how scummy it was of him to blame her, armchair psychoanalyze her, label her an addict or a zealot or both...

Y'all need to learn to center your own agency so that when someone gives you facts you don't like about what they will/won't do in a relationship, you cut your losses and leave instead of wasting your time trying to "figure him out". He said what he said. If it's not for you, it's not for you.

It's. Not. That. Deep.[/quote]

He admitted to being an addict.[/quote]

So addicts don't get to have agency? They don't get to draw boundaries around their recovery? If they were an addict, they have to engage their addiction(s) to please you?

Him admitting to be an addict doesn't justify the wackadoodle nonsense most of the posters here keep spouting off about.[/quote]

There is nothing wrong with this guy stating his boundaries. Women are just noticing that he has an addiction as well as depression and is controlling the sexual relationship and the timetable for marriage. Women should be asking themselves whether they are ok with these boundaries, possible future addiction issues, the guy's breakdown related to a death, and if there are ulterior self-interested motives to setting these boundaries. There is no right or wrong answer to staying with him. OP just asked for advice.

I don't understand your comment about engaging in the addiction. Why would you marry if you didn't intend to have sex during the marriage? The addiction is sex and typically a marriage involves sex.
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