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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I haven’t read all the replies… but are people really hosting dinner parties & cookouts that often? We almost never invite adults to our house, and have very rarely been invited to other people’s houses. We occasionally eat out with other families, but usually if kids & parents get together, we meet at a neutral location and go for a hike, visit a museum, etc.

My parents were/are very welcoming of people dropping by but also never hosted dinner parties. Maybe it’s a class thing or regional thing.

As for the OP, yes, I have friends like that, but oh well. We keep inviting them to do stuff & continue to have their kids over to play. The ones I stop inviting are the ones who always cancel after saying they can meet up. [/quote]

Yes. We actually host dinner parties, brunches and  tea parties.

But, we have seasons that we host people, and then months that we do not host at home.  For example - we have not hosted large groups for dinner at home since November, all the way to Feb.  We have only called very close family for dinner and it has not been super fancy.  March-April and May will be the time that I will host several dinners and tea-parties.  Each will include different groups of people.  Then I will be busy in Sept-Oct to host a series of religious celebrations.   Some other families like to celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas.  So, I will cook several dishes and take it to their homes for celebrations like each year.  My Thanksgiving and Christmas remains limited to my close family, and it very often means catered food.

In the months that I don't entertain at home. I basically invite people to restaurants, plays, dinners, spa, walks and movies OR we attend as guests the parties we are invited to.  The truth is that there is a real cost in terms of physical labor, time, effort, money, planning. stress etc.  Also, the "off times" is required so that the house can be made 'guest and entertaining ready'.  Besides, your normal regular life also continues.

If you are calling large groups of people - there is economy of scale for sure, but, your entire house has to be 'guest and entertaining ready' to accommodate everyone.   The reason that I entertain in cluster is that I can book some help a few months out, as well as economize on booze, cleaning, food etc.  The house gets deep cleaned and spruced for one party, and it remains quite clean and spruced up for the next one too with a bit of effort.

It is NOT EASY to host because you have to clean a lot, make space, figure out seating, figure out serving dishes and other stuff, before you even think of drinks, food, and entertainment.   And if you don't host regularly, you absolutely lose confidence in your ability to host.  You forget how to do things. Your brain does not function in the host mode at all. [/quote]

Please say more about these adult tea parties you host! I am agog.[/quote]

I mainly only host ladies for tea parties.  Usually women who can be easily grouped together. Neighbors, relatives, mom-friends, hobby/activity group etc. DH and kids are told to become invisible until I need them for helping me.  I usually create a group for the invite, instructions, reminders, thank yous and sending photos of the tea-party.  This also allows people to know who all are invited to the party, what their contact info is etc.

Menu consists of variety of tea-sandwiches (cucumber, egg, salmon), homemade baked goods, several filling savory dishes, some snacks that are bought etc. Food is arranged  on the dining table for people to self serve.  Also, lemon water, plates, silverware, napkins, condiments etc.  I usually buy flowers from Costco or TJ and display it around the house and also where food is served.  If more than 6 people are invited, I make sure that tea is already brewed with milk.  I don't add any sweetner. Guests can choose to add sugar or sweetner. I also give a choice of lemon water, caffeine-free tea or instant coffee.

I stick to 4 pm tea time. Before the party, I arrange the seating so everyone can sit in one big room and also it is easy for me to serve tea.  That's it.

People talk to each other because mostly they know each other and it is usually very lively conversation. People are asked to dress well as we take group pictures and that's pretty much how the party ends.

After everyone leaves - I run the dishwasher and hand wash any delicate serveware or tea-cups.  We put back the chairs and seating in their proper place, I vacuum and mop, and then I send all the group pictures to the attendees.

When my entertaining season starts, I start with tea-parties. It is way easier than a full fledged dinner and does not go as long as a dinner. Also, menu is easier and can be as eclectic as you want.  I start off by hosting  neighbors, hobby-friends, mom-friends, relatives etc first.  It gets me into the swing of things and people around me don't feel left out if they are not invited to dinners etc because they have been invited to tea parties.  Tea parties also gives me a chance to try out any new appetizers I want to serve in more formal dinners.

[/quote]

Thank you for answering my question, these events sound lovely![/quote]

You are welcome. :)[/quote]

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