Reply to How/why do people have a second (or more?!?!) child?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Everyone says they love having kids but to me, [b]parents look absolutely miserable[/b]. Having kids isn’t fun but it’s the only way to have a family and surround yourself with people later in life. [/quote]

I probably look miserable but it's not because of my kid. I love being a parent and love spending time with my kid and I don't really even mind a lot of the drudgery of it.

I think I look miserable because I'm middle aged and I just get more annoyed with people as I age. Or people get more annoying. Either, or both. But I don't feel miserable because of my kid. That's the bright spot in any day. Even when I'm annoyed with her, I'm still happier than I am being annoyed with anyone else.

I actually assume she will go off and live her own life later, BTW. I don't expect her to be my permanent companion in my old age. That's why DH and I have each other, plus work to maintain friendships and community. The expectation that your children will spend the rest of their lives gathered around you keeping you from feeling lonely is just unrealistic. Are you currently spending most of your time with your elderly parents? Or are you working, traveling, mostly focused on your own life? Because that's what your kids will be doing too.[/quote]

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