Reply to I’m breadwinner, dh asked me to help with side hustle

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][twitter][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I will full admit that if he were the breadwinner or  even matched my salary, I wouid have zero issue being the default parent.

I am not ok with

Researching + piecing together summer camps
Doing forms and paperwork for camps 
Paying for the camps out of my money
Noticing that the kids need new shoes and 
Paying for the shoes out of my money 
[/quote]

Sorry, if these are the tasks that are just *overwhelming* you I don’t think you ARE capable of being a high school level admin for him anyway.  [b]Seriously, researching camps takes like 10 minutes.  Filling out the forms? 10 minutes x number of kids.  “Noticing” the kids need shoes?  30 seconds? [/b] Then ordering a size up online is another 5 minutes x number of kids x number of half sizes their feet grow per year.

So generously we’re talking maybe three hours of effort per year, and you’re whining about it.  It’s obviously just about the money.  Sorry you’re not actually RHDC the princess you thought you were going to be 8 years ago…[/quote]

Tell me you don’t have kids without telling me you don’t have kids (or you live in a 1 stoplight town with one camp). Sneaker shopping for 2 kids took over an hour this week bc sizes are so inconsistent. [/quote]

You sound like a loon. Buying a kid sneakers takes a single trip to a store to try on some shoes.[/quote]

and you sound like an idiot who never learned to add.

[/quote]

This math has been done for you.  These tasks take about 10 hours *per year* unless you’re just wasting a bunch of time, but that’s your choice at that point.

I would count “dragging out tasks and making them far more complicated than necessary” on the hobbies and interests side of the ledger.

You want to spend 3 hours on a Sunday researching the perfect summer camp, calling all the other moms to discuss, then researching back ups, then finally signing up?  Great!  Have at it!  Your husband would rather spend 10 minutes to see if the county rec centers closest to your house have spots available that week, and then decide between the limited options on offer by thinking to himself “would larlo prefer bike camp or crafts camp?” Then he signs up.  Then he plays golf or takes a nap for 2 hours.[/quote]

again with the camp. camp is ONE example. DHs like this do NOTHING. I don’t think you get it. [/quote]

DP. I'm a DH who does all this stuff; every camp and activity sign up, every doctors' appointment, transportation to everything, making lunches and dinners, etc. It's nothing. Whining about it immediately marks you out as someone who needs more on her plate, because apparently you have time to whine about the basics of life.[/quote]

Yup.  I’m the “pick me” wife (apparently) and over the years I have learned so much from my DH (who probably does more than I do).  He doesn’t waste time researching or agonizing over every basic life decision.  He just sees what needs to be done and then… does it.  And I have never heard him whine or complain about any of it.

When I started trying to just make quick decisions like him I magically gained a lot more time in my day.  Are all of the choices I make optimal?  Probably not.  Are they all good enough?  Absolutely.[/quote]

ffs lady. your situation is *nothing like* OPs. will you stfu. [/quote]

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