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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP you need to understand and accept that 9 out of 10 MILs only care about their child, and care about their spouses only inasmuch as they add value to their children’s lives.
It’s just the way it is.
Don’t expect your MIL to care even if she is polite enough to ask you how you are etc 
That’s why she is trying to assess the situation FOR HER SON and maybe her grandchild, and do so without you standing in the way and blocking the airwaves so to speak.
Use your own parents for comfort! Stop expecting it from ILs!
Signed,
-someone who has been burned [/quote]

So I wasn’t wrong then when I said mil sees me merely as an incubator?

That’s not good mil behavior.

A lot of mils love and care about their DILs and even see them as a second daughter.[/quote]

It’s not true. The faster you get rid of this assumption the better off you will be.
I’ve been burned twice.
First I thought that a host family is just like real family.
Second, I thought my FIL genuinely liked me, just because he was decent to me (unlike my somewhat crazy parents).
OP do you have a distant or tumultuous relationship with your own parents? If yes, your need to find a loving and stable parent is unfulfilled and is projected onto your MIL.
She is the wrong object of your projection though. 
Yes she sees you as someone who is supposed to take care of her son and produce kids for him (and grandkids for her).
If she was smarter she would take your DH for a walk and ask him questions and then explicitly tell him not to talk about it with you. 
[/quote]

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