Reply to Can anyone please explain the mindset of parents who allow “failure to launch”?

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Reply to "Can anyone please explain the mindset of parents who allow “failure to launch”?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My coworker has two adults sons living with him and his wife. They both work full time and mom does everything (clean, cook, laundry). I always sense that the mom sort of likes having her sons in the house. So maybe failure to launch in some way benefits parents (even if it’s a psychological).[/quote]

I agree with this. My 30 something cousins work full time, make good money and live with their parents. One of them has a girlfriend he stays with sometimes and one doesn't date. My aunt absolutely loves having them at home because it makes her feel like she's still a young mother. She tries to commiserate with me about "cooking for boys" even though my boys are actually children![/quote]

Maybe she just enjoys being a mother. People who enjoy it don't just turn it off once their kids turn 18. People who were just going through the motions might be a different story.

That would gall me to compare cooking for adult kids to the relentless demands of feeding actual kids, though.
[/quote]

So what. 
She’s not launching her kids. She’s stunting them and coddling them.  They’re not developing adult or life partner or even roommate skills.

There is much to be said for developing one’s own way and having exposure to other people’s ways. Often things via spending time at friends families, having roommates, dating and more time with other families.

You learn to adapt, be flexible, compromise. You learn there are other ways of doing things, eating different meals, other traditions, new places. You MAY even learn BETTER ways of doing things!! Gasp!!! [/quote]

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