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Reply to "comebacks for mean MS kids?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Perhaps it's because I work in the criminal justice system, but why are parents to encourage finding the most harmful way to hurt others (even if they are bullies). I mean, especially today on the anniversary of Columbine [/quote] I have the same reaction. Are people really teaching their kids to treat other people like this? I get it, the bullying is hard and damaging, and you just want it to stop. But good lord, how old are these respondents? We have no hope for America.[/quote] I'm one of the PP's that has advised to "go nuclear" I guess my question for you guys is, after you've tried all the other things (avoiding, ignoring, eye rolls, engaging the teachers/administrators, etc), at what point is it ok to stand up for yourself? At what point is all that just code for "allowing yourself to be abused"?[/quote] It's a "when they go low, we go high" sort of moment of character building for your kid. I'd rather my child be bullied than coach them to be a bad human.[/quote] A moment of character building? Do you know what being bullied does to a kid? Have you seen your kid sink into a depression and have their self esteem completely eroded, seen grades drop and watched their ability to trust and form friendships fade away? Have you seen them smile, and then be startled because you can't remember the last time that happened? If so, I promise you, you'd know that this isn't an opportunity for character building. They don't hear "oh, I get it, I can learn to be a better person by rising above - this will turn me into a stronger, more well rounded person!" They hear "sit there and drown, kid." [b]Character building. JFC. That's like saying that someone being mugged should reflect on how they can focus less on material things. [/b] [/quote] +100 I can't imagine saying "when they go low, we go high" to a kid that comes in tears on a regular basis, or has bowel issues before gym class because they are so nervous, or begs to stay home bc school is so miserable, or they break out in hives, or believe it or not, have hair fall out, or stop eating. they don't leave their rooms at home. And after you've tried all of it, you just say, "just keep your head down; this will eventually make you a better person" I'm sorry, but that's wrong. You eventually have to teach the child the real world. Which involves standing up for yourself. There is a valid lesson in: "we don't start the fight, but do we finish them" And as I said previously, they will need your help on how to be brutal. But they [b]NEED[/b] that brutality. You have to help them find it. That is the real world[/quote]
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