Reply to How many parents still financially support their middle age adult children?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is common in MoCo. Lots of money.

By "supported," do you mean 80-100% support? Or do you mean paying for fancy vacations and private school?

We had some help paying for private school and then some expenses here and there that my parents offered to pay for. I never asked. They wanted to help. However, I also have a friend with a trust fund (never had to work but chose to) and a friend who has been under-employed and probably receives quite a bit from the parents. The ILs have put a lot of money into a 529. So we have had help, but we don't have a fancy house, live in a wonderful neighborhood or drive new cars.[/quote]

The spectrum of support really doesn't matter nor does if you request it or not: aspects of your lifestyle have been supported by your parents. Just own it and stop rationalizing it.[/quote]

For me, I find the op’s question a little confusing…I’m the one who mentioned my parents paying for things like our condo on vacation. The op asked when people in their 40s will learn to support themselves and stop relying on their parents and whether it’s our long-term plan to be supported by parents for ever. I’m not sure what’s expected. Refuse my parents’ gifts? Ask them to take me out of the will? Without them paying for the condo we would have paid and been fine, but they wanted to. We paid for our car and pay our rent and our kids go to public school. So I think it’s fair to say my parents support me in that they give me money - and it’s part of my forever plan in that I expect I will inherit when they pass. However, at the same time I’ve view the money as emergency / rainy day / shouldn’t assume it’s coming. A wonderful support to be sure, but not support in the sense of changing any spending habits. Like if they send me a note a few times a year with $100 and say “please hire a sitter” , that’s awesome. But without that $100 we could easily have done the same. The foundation it gave me was life changing but as a 40 something they’re not actively enabling my lifestyle in a life changing way. So the word “support” gets confusing. People are using it as any help at all or as enabling you to afford your home / pay for private etc. [/quote]

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