Reply to Son pledging there’s definitely hazing

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Contrary to many other posts, there's really no way anyone can advise you on a course of action without knowing what "pretty bad" means.  [/quote]

Agree, if the pledge is uncomfortable and in danger, report and drop.  If the kid is just pissed for having to clean up the house after a party or drive a drunk brother home (the right thing to do) than a whole other story...technically "hazing" but part of the deal and if it bothers him than a fraternity probably is not for him.[/quote]

He was fully prepared for that kind of thing.  No this is forced eating of horrible stuff  with vomit of 40 guys for hours ensuing that were allowed only the floor to do so then “activities” in the vomit.  Literally all day everyone yelling at you you’re a piece of shit, etc.  yes stupid stuff like driving he could care less about that.  He actually believes one guy is psychotic/sociopath.  It’s 7 weeks.  Severe, dangerous sleep deprivation.  10 guys left after first night.  I want him to quit but has to come from him.  We’d wholeheartedly support him and he has the confidence to quit. He is well- liked, has a lot of friends, a girlfriend, has a good future ahead of him

The comment about, if he stays, doing this to others was something we talked about last night.  He’s worried about that.  He also said he’s “mentally tough” but I reminded him none of us know where are breaking point may be. [/quote]

I'm the PP you are responding too.  I have had 3 kids pledge and my advice is for him to drop and report full stop.  He sounds like a fine young man and there is no reason to stay, an organization that executes their pledge activities like that needs to be shut down.  There are plenty of fraternities that do not conduct themselves like that. [/quote]

This +1  I am the PP which has a DS at UVA in a frat. He actually told me after having gone through pledging, he has less respect for those that did it at other notoriously hard pledging processes because its so easy just to drop.  Makes you wonder about a person who could voluntarily go through what OP's son is describing. To the other PP's point though, there are absolutely other fraternities that do not even come close to that type of hazing. The boys just need to find them, ask around and go in eyes wide open with one foot out the door in case they see or are asked to do something they are uncomfortable with.[/quote]

But UVA has taken a strong stance against hazing. Two frats were terminated in 2022 for hazing at UVA. Google UVA terminates two fraternities, July 2022, I believe.
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