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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a Middle Eastern person (and, for the record, the parent of an only child), I am physically incapable of not being a generous host and overdoing it with the food. My child has a diverse circle of friends and classmates — many have parents that work part of the weekend, are raised by single parents, have parents with limited English, live in multi-generation households, etc. — and it’s important to me to make it as comfortable as possible for all to attend and feel welcomed.

With that little rant over, I think it’s totally fine for OP to do as she proposed. [/quote]

As a South Asian person, we also overdo it with food and generosity while hosting. We too have a very diverse circle of friends and classmates representing many parts of the world. And most of them appreciate and recognize the efforts we put in as hosts.  We also include everyone in our celebrations (siblings, parents, relatives, neighbors, friends, relatives, classmates)...but, I would not presume that many families that invite our child for birthday parties should be throwing a similar party as us. If they want to limit their guestlists to only a few children (age of child + 1)  and if it is a drop off party and if they only serve cake and hot dgs and they have restrictions about the number of children etc, then as good guests we adhere to that.

The question here is not how someone else is hosting. The question here is how guests should behave and follow the etiquette of someone else's celebration. OP is an adult. She can figure it out without imposing in any way on the host. [/quote]

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