Reply to Mom speaking to child in another language during playdate

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wow. Our school community has lots of bilingual (and trilingual) families. It would never occur to me that speaking to eachother in their native tongue would be considered rude or a faux pas. [/quote]

Well, now you know![/quote]

+1. In front of other people who don't speak the language actively excluding them? Yes, rude. Do people come from places with no manners? Wasn't there a thread about how rude it is to turn a back on someone recently and how in most cultures that is rude? This is the same thing. [/quote]

Parents practicing OPOL are excluding the other parent all the time and [b]somehow survive unscathed.[/b] It’s fine.[/quote]

You sure about that?   There's never been a single divorce in such families?[/quote]

You don’t know why they divorce and it’s just as common in monolingual families.

I don’t understand 70% of conversation between my DH and my children, and it doesn’t bother me one bit.[/quote]

Yes, if you feel a certain way that means everyone else feels the exact same way.   Got it.[/quote]

I’m just telling you a very common thing in bi and trilingual families.[/quote]

And I'm just telling you that speaks very poorly of very common bi and trilingual families.[/quote]

Why tho?[/quote]

BECAUSE IT'S RUDE. You're basically saying that teaching your child to be bi or trilingual is more important to you than teaching them manners. And that speaks very poorly of bi and trilingual familes -- that they are raising rude children.

Hate to say it, but many people on this thread may not realize it's the norm to not speak in another language in front of those that don't understand it because they are from somewhere else. But that's the norm here. So now you know.[/quote]

So, if you go to a museum and there are Japanese tourists you just don't speak till they leave?  Do you never vacation in a country where you don't speak the language?

[/quote]

Of course not. That's not the same. We're talking about being with other people, socializing together, and speaking in a language that excludes some of the people you are with.

Of course that doesn't apply to random strangers.[/quote]

I don’t  speak my husbands language and he doesn’t speak mine. We only speak our respective languages to our children. No one is bothered, but you insist that they simply must be.  [/quote]

Don't complain when no one invites you to join their book club.[/quote]

Are you bringing small children to book clubs? What’s next, ladies luncheon?[/quote]

No, the moms who are being excluded by you rudely talking in another language right in front of them are the ones who are going to tell you, "Sorry, our book club is not taking any new members." Then you can post on DCUM how unfair and "cliqueish" they are, when really they just don't want to invite you because you are rude to them.[/quote]

There are plenty of moms who feel different for this not to matter.[/quote]

OK, have fun then.[/quote]

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