Reply to SIL wants us to write her girls letters at camp

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Do you have to? No. But why wouldn’t you? It will take a few minutes and put a huge smile on your niece’s face. [/quote]

Why won’t my husband? [/quote]
[b]Because this sort of thing is a female thing. So is (in general), remembering birthdays and anniversaries[/b]. And women create these situations, and then get mad when their men forget to do it or don't do it the way the woman wanted it done.

I'm a wife of 20+ years, and believe that once you see it the way I've outlined above, it can only benefit you, and save you from being angry in these situations.[/quote]

It’s 1950s outdated sexist trash and “benefits” no one.[/quote]

+100  I blame a lot of this on the rwnjs who are trying to put women in their place back in 1950.[/quote]

Wow.  some of you guys are just ADAMENT about not having a relationship with your DH's side of the family.  Which, to be honest, feels like you're just setting yourselves up for failure[/quote]

DP.  Failure?  What failure?  Not writing postcards doesn't mean I don't have or don't want a relationship with my DH's side of the family.  What I DO want is to be able to have relationships on my terms, not what is dictated by someone else, especially people who hold outdated, patriarchal attitudes about the role of women - that includes women with those attitudes.  If my DH's family don't like what I bring to a relationship and how I bring it, fine.  Choices should be respected. [/quote]

Relationships are give and take, never solely on one side’s terms.  And the relationship here in question is between OP and her niece/nephews.[/quote]

Sure, but it's OP's SIL that's directing people to write.  If writing a letter/postcard isn't OP's love language, she can easily find another way to foster the relationship - if she chooses.  It's not like this is a one time opportunity.  And, we all get to decide what we want to invest/do in a relationship.  If the other person doesn't find that agreeable, they can choose to disengage.  Each person has choices. [/quote]

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