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[quote=Anonymous]Reviving this thread, hope you don't mind.

I've been grappling with the should I/shouldn't I question for at least 5 years. Awhile back I said I would work on the marriage for the benefit of our kids, when I otherwise would have been long gone. I've been doing that ever since. Without getting into too much detail, some things have changed, some haven't.  DH has addressed a dealbreaker that I brought to his attention. I've tried hard to work on myself (what I can control).  Again, all for the kids. The rest of our issues are still festering, but the thought of seeing my kids less is unfathomable. And DH has also shown to make many objectively poor decisions so I would be concerned about his time alone with them. My plan is to continue to work on our marriage and hope our efforts pay off.  I experience joy in raising and being with my kids and my friends. I will continue this until the kids are older or possibly even out of the house.  At that point I'll reassess. No, I'm not happy being with him, but from what I can tell divorce isn't a magical pill that makes all the bad stuff disappear. There are unknowns that no one can answer definitively, like what impact that will have on the kids at this stage in their lives. How I'll feel about coparenting and the people who will have intimate access to my kids in the future (i.e. step parent/family). I would also be giving up half of my HHI, which means the lifestyle I have now and that my kids enjoy and have become accustomed to would need to change drastically.  We would need to maintain two homes, which would likely mean living in a less expensive area, further from my kids friends and activities.

If there were abuse, alcoholism or some other serious issue it would be different for me. But I'm willing to deal with our current issues until the kids are older. [/quote]

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