Reply to I regret having kids. I don't like being a mom. And it's affecting my marriage

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Reply to "I regret having kids. I don't like being a mom. And it's affecting my marriage"

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[quote=Anonymous]I love my ES-age kids with all my heart and yearn for a life where I have the energy, patience, and desire to be the mom I think I should be. Instead I am also wrapped up in bitterness, jealousy, resentment, anger. Can't let go of how much of myself I have given up, the conflicting emotions I feel of wanting to have more time to myself yet feeling guilty about not playing more with my kids, planning more with them, being more involved in their lives. The other week I mentioned that it was very hard to go back to work after a short maternity leave with my first baby, who wouldn't take formula, when I had a long commute, and I really felt for women who only had a six week maternity leave. My DH looked at me blankly and said "20 minutes isn't a long commute and 16 weeks is a long maternity leave". He didn't even remember that I worked downtown and had a 10 week maternity leave after our first baby! I was flabbergasted. It was the hardest time of my life. It feels like motherhood has been 10 years of compounding burnout for me, and yet DHs focus seems to be that my stress over this causes him more stress. I dream about leaving him a list of clothing sizes and shoe sizes and just walking away. Yet this fantasy gives me to pleasure, only more guilt and bad feelings. [/quote]

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