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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]1.  22 years of marriage, and i've never handled any of those things.  I handle my family, DH handles his.

2.  As a consequence,[b] I'm sure his family have all kinds of nasty things to say about me behind my back. [/b]

3.  But conveniently, we basically never see or talk to them (see item #1 above), so this is not my problem. If DH feels bad about some tension with his family (which he periodically does), he can put more time into it.  [/quote]

What if they had nothing to say about you at all?  Like there is nothing to discuss?   I'm sure you like the thought of them stewing about you but it could really be the opposite.  The question is to you prevent the get togethers with his family?  [b]Often times the DIL will do this to estrange the father's family and they can get away with it more easily.[/b][/quote]

DP.  I have no doubt the PP would be rejoice if her ILs had nothing to say about her. I doubt that's the case and the bolded statement highlights your misogyny. Dropping the rope is very different than 'preventing' get togethers.  The other spouse always has a choice.  A DH may choose to not attend get togethers but that's not the fault of the DIL.  Stop blaming DILs for the choices their DHs make. Hold the DH accountable.[/quote]

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