Reply to Why Men Cheat - How Can I Break This Cycle?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] [I]nstead of figuring out how sex can be an enjoyable experience for their wives, men interpret their wives’ experience in life as an affront to their manhood. 
[/quote]

One of my problems was that my wife wasn't an active participant in helping to figure out how to make sex an enjoyable experience. Initially she said she didn't know why she didn't want to have sex and then, when I pressed a little bit, she cited body image issues. She hates her body. Beyond telling and showing her that I like her body, that kind of shuts me out of the process. It's frustrating to have so little influence over my own sex life. [/quote]

[b]Does she have time to work out?[/b]  I have some body image issues too and I feel better about myself when I have time and space to work out regularly.  Last night I got back from a barre class at 6:30 (after working at my FT job all day) and was feeling pretty good… until I walked in the door and my kids asked what was for dinner while my DH played on his phone.  My lady parts all but sealed themselves shut.[/quote]

Oh yeah. She's run three full marathons and I don't know how many half-marathons over the last 10 years. It hasn't really helped her with what she regards as her weight problem, but running does make her feel better in general. Anyway, with all of the hours that kind of training entails, time to work out isn't an issue. (If I'm honest, I envy that about her schedule. My only work out options are at the ass end of the day, either really early or really late.) [/quote]

I guess this is proof that everyone’s issues are individual.  
It sounds like your marathon loving wife who cannot have sex because of body image issues needs some serious therapy.  [/quote]

She's just started. Maybe that will help the sex, maybe it won't. (I suspect not - it's a long process, and we're entering our 50s; so menopause and ED will probably overtake us faster than therapy will provide benefits.) But hopefully it makes her happier. Since she's started therapy, she's been a lot more open about how f**ked up diet culture and weight concerns have made her. I knew those things bothered her, but probably didn't appreciate how deeply. [/quote]

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