Reply to Twin play date, one twin left out…

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So nice to hear non-twin  parents[b] blocking friendships[/b] and penalizing kids based on a slightly awkward situation that is not at all within the kids’ control. [/quote]

dp But is it really the non twin parent who is blocking friendships? It seems that twin parents are because you are not allowing individual friendships to blossom and you are elevating the twins' relationship.  You are family and have tons of opportunity to bond with you twin when you are at home.  Two hours away from your twin isn't going to kill anyone![/quote]

It isn’t about the difficulty being away from the other twin. I wouldn’t send both of my twins if only one was invited. It’s the idea that people don’t even want to bother inviting one twin because they feel guilty excluding the other one so they just exclude both. I agree it’s harder and there is no right answer, but it’s sad to see your kids get excluded literally just because they are twins and other parents don’t want to deal with that.[/quote]

[b]Well, if the expectation is I have to invite both it is on you for making the situation, not the host.  My kid wanted to have a playdate with the one twin but, I knew it would cause problems because they did everything together.  So maybe twin parents should think about this [/b]and not blame the non twin parent.  It has nothing to do with extra work but, the fact that my kid is the odd person out and it would be a totally different ( not necessarily better) experience for my dd and the one twin.[/quote]

I have hesitated many times before inviting one twin to come over and play because I know that the parents will feel hurt that their other twin is not invited. So we just move on to another classmate and invite them.[/quote]

This is literally exactly my point. I do appreciate that you don’t want to hurt the other twin’s feelings but it’s not awesome to feel like neither kid is getting invites bc they happen to have a twin and people don’t want to be awkward/entangled. [/quote]

I am the first pp.  So what would you suggest that happens?  Invite the one twin?   If inviting both wouldn't work, what do you suggest?  Especially since the op and others seem to want twins to both go on the playdate.  Heck, op even got herself invited![/quote]

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