Reply to Teen son slapped my face, what should I do

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For those of you saying that you would have hit the son back (or your husband would have), I'm curious.  Are you saying that the violence is a sound parenting strategy, or that it would be instinct?  If sound parenting strategy, how do you think it will help resolve the situation moving forward?

Seems one of the issues in this family is that people tend to react to violence with violence.  How does perpetuating that help?[/quote]

It’s a life lesson. If you assault someone weaker than you then what goes around comes around. If the kid slaps the wrong person in the real world of adults he may end up dead so he needs to learn this lesson early on.[/quote]

Agree with the first point. Op’s older son slapped her because he was hit by the younger son/his brother. And now many posters are saying/implying that op or her spouse should have reacted by hitting the older son? No no no.

This is tough, Op. And you need to react seriously. But I don’t agree to use violence and I also don’t agree it means your son will grow up to be abusive - if this was the first time he reacted this way, he probably just impulsively snapped. You can use that to point out his younger brother’s impulsivity.

But older son and your whole family needs a thorough discussion, I agree with therapist, about the dangers of using violence, AND to give older son a safe opportunity to share how he’s feeling with respect to younger siblings and his parents’ reactions. [/quote]

You don't slap your mom because you got slapped by a sibling.  OP is failing both of these kids.  You don't scapegoat their behavior screaming mental health.  You give them strong consequences and make it clear its not acceptable and repeat each time.  If the younger son is that out of control, he may need residential.[/quote]

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