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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This thread (and my own marriage) does make me wonder why open relationships aren't more common (maybe they are and I live in a bubble)? I love my husband, we have sex 1-2 times per week, but knowing exactly what's going to happen really takes the spice out of it. We try to mix it up from time to time but admittedly it's good, not amazing, most of the time. I don't remember if it was this thread or another but someone mentioned wanting a marriage sabbatical and that would truly be my dream. I love my husband, he is a wonderful partner, but I just want to mix it up with something hot and new without messing up our otherwise great life together (and I want that for him too). Do most open marriages fail/turn into a mess? Why aren't they more common?[/quote]

Amen, sister.

Marriage and monogamy are very eye opening come mid 40s and 20 years in. If we cut the charade, and you talk amongst your close circle, very few women really want to have sex with their husbands. Perhaps on vacation when there are no distractions it can feel good but I say it's like going to the gym. I have zero desire for it but I probably feel better after, at least feeling that I did something good for my marriage.

My husband is a good, attractive man. I know he has options, has he cheated? Who knows, and some days, who cares as long as he isn't wasting our money or inviting some stalker into our lives.

Open marriages sound amazing on paper. In reality, I would fear it's the beginning of the end. I remember what incredible sex was like and what they does to you. It's a dangerous drug. [/quote]

As someone once wrote on DCUM, "open marriages are like socialism. Great on paper but terrible in real life". What blows them up? The woman has an unlimited number of potential sex partners and/or the man catches feelings for someone else. [/quote]

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