Reply to Disgusted by Wife’s Obesity But Don’t Want a Divorce

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It sounds like she's depressed.  The not having any motivation is a pretty good indicator.  She probably feels bad about herself, feels bad about how you view her, and is doing a lot of self loathing.  Have you tried a different approach?   [/quote]

This. There is no way she doesn't know how she looks. She probably feels uncomfortable and horrible. And helpless to change it. That doesn't make for great motivation.

Nothing you do is going to change it either, OP. As others have said, it has to come from her. Also, this doesn't make her a bad person. She is more than her body. I'm not saying you have to be attracted to her at that weight but neither is she some filthy disgusting creature, as you and others on this thread seem to be saying. Just as she has control over her body, you have control over yourself. If you aren't attracted to her, then don't have sex with her. If you're so disgusted you can't even live with her, then divorce her. But don't stay and make her and yourself and everyone else miserable by secretly loathing her or not so secretly shaming her.

And when you stay married and cheat, don't blame her. You are responsible for your own choices, just as she is. Just because she got fat doesn't force you to cheat. That's something you'll decide of your own accord, that your dick is more important than your family. Lots of men make this choice so don't worry, you won't be alone. Really you might as well do her a favor and divorce. You can find yourself a hot young chick and feel virile and superior, and your wife can do whatever it is she's doing now, but without you around to belittle her. Win-win. 
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