Reply to ES Parents, please listen in to one or two zoom classes to make sure your kid isn’t “that kid”

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Reply to "ES Parents, please listen in to one or two zoom classes to make sure your kid isn’t “that kid” "

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[quote=Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There are a lot of parents who dismiss teacher’s comments about behavior simply because they cannot “see” the behavior.  Meaning, they ignore it, whereas a teacher in a classroom of 25 students cannot ignore the behavior as it is preventing learning from happening.

While harnessing children’s behavior with jobs and tasks work with some children, it is not helpful for all. For example, it is effective for early finishers that disrupt others who are still working, but it for the student running around the classroom or refusing to work.[b] That student will learn disruption=reward, and while it is a band aid for that time period, the cycle will continue as it becomes a learned behavior.[/b] When that student goes to another class and the teacher does not continue the cycle, that does not make the teacher a poor teacher nor not liking children as a PP stated.  There is nothing magical about reinforcing negative behaviors, but there is something magical about a teacher-parent collaboration that encourages and supports growth.[/quote]

That is not what happens. [b]Actually what happens is a bond develops between the problem child, the teacher and the class, and that solves a lot of the behavioral problems right there. [/b]But some people prefer the satisfaction they get from punishing -- winning -- rather than changing the problem student for the better.

I've even seen teachers ignoring the PITA child -- always a boy -- who raises his hand over and over and over and never gets called on because he's the PITA kid. That's wrong. Again, I'm not talking about my own kids but what I've seen sitting in on classes.[/quote]
But isn’t the whole point of parenting to prepare our kids to adapt to various environments? That they need to be respectful and listen regardless of whether they have a “special bond” with their teacher or not? My kids’ teachers have ranged from outstanding to very “meh” in terms of classroom management and my kids know — because I have actually taken my time to, y’know, parent them — how to behave regardless.[/quote]

Yes, of course, but most of these kids are missing something at home. You assume I am defending the parenting but I'm not -- I'm defending the problem children. Big difference. Adults should give a crap about children, and if they aren't being parented well then you should have some sympathy for them.

Listen to this:  https://interactive.wbez.org/room205/

There is a scene where a boy in 4th grade, who has seen his mother shot by her boyfriend and is basically being raised by siblings, is dragged in front of the class so his classmates can tell him what a PITA he is and how much he gets in the way of their ability to learn. That is just disgusting. Then when he is placed in foster care he cries -- why? Because he won't be able to see his classmates or his teacher anymore. He needs them -- because he has nothing at home. He also acts out in class for the same reason.

Kids who are craving attention should get it. They shouldn't be punished for begging for what they need (and deserve as children), which is what being disruptive is.

I know many people think other kids don't "deserve" more because hey, that takes away from what their kid gets, but actually it would take care of the problem for your kids too because the "problem child" would be a lot easier to deal with if they got a tiny scrap of attention and concern.[/quote]

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