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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]I was hoping that by seeing how much they’ve uprooted my life and made me miserable, they’d concede to outside help[/quote]

You CAN NOT be afraid of Mommy and Daddy not liking you. You have power over your own life.[/quote]

Seriously, this is absurd.  Middle-aged adults are letting their parents run their lives.  [/quote]

It's not absurd. These are difficult conversations and some of us are wracked with guilt at the thought of our parents moving to facilities or institutions where we don't know how the care will be. Sometimes these responsibilities also sneak up on you a bit; you start out by handling a few things and the list keeps growing. OR, in many cases, a parent has a fall or illness and you care for them during that time and, guess what? They don't get better or they never get back to the level they were before the event. All of a sudden you realize that you are still doing everything and the parent has gotten comfortable with the care they're getting. It's not simple or easy.[/quote]

Yes, this.  Or you try to have reasonable and rational discussions with the aging parent but they refuse to talk about it, call you a bully, etc.  You cannot force an adult -- any adult -- to do something they don't want to do.  My mom has refused to consider moving to assisted living and has damn near killed herself by insisting she needs no help, but completely failing to take care of herself.  And she has gotten a terrible reputation in the rehab facilities in her town because she is so difficult to deal with, so it gets even harder to find a placement for her.

I think our generation is different because we aren't as tied to our homes and we have lived through this (miserable) experience with our own parents.  I love the idea of living in a dorm again, with someone else doing the cleaning and cooking![/quote]

Actually you can depending on the situation.   I loved my MIL but couldn't take care of her anymore.  I dropped her off at a nursing home (still was heavily involved).  There was no other good option as we couldn't do home care in our home due to money and space.[/quote]

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