Reply to When the Other Woman meets your kids

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]I think this was well stated. It's absolutely vital to tell the kids the truth because they will ask why they are divorcing. Why is dad living with Suzie? Why do I have to share my dad and toys with Suzie's kids? Etc. Etc.

One can be honest, but not giving out marriage details or as someone suggested not using your child as a therapist. That's totally wrong. So is bad mouthing the other parent - the kids will form their own opinions.

If he ends up with the AP I don't see a reason OP would have to talk to her. Only talk to the ex about the kids.[/quote]

For the last time:  Because your kid is not your therapist.  Because this is how most conversations would go:

Mom: dad is living with Suzie because he slept with her and I kicked him out
Dad: I slept with Suzie because mom cut-off all physical affection
Mom: I cut off affection because dad didn't meet my emotional needs
Dad: I was busy working because mom decided to downscale at work and ran up some unnecessary spending

You get the point.  Seriously, there are always two sides to this.  Your kid isn't the ref.  Grow up.
[/quote]

I agree. I was never talking about that, nor wrote you should say those things to kids.

Only if the kids asked I  would simply say dad didn't want to be married anymore. We're getting divorced and Suzie is at his house because that's who he's been dating. [/quote]

Lie by omission is still a lie and your kid will not appreciate being lied to. They will learn to lie instead of putting all the cards on the table like an mature adult. [/quote]

You can be honest without unloading on them. If they don't like Suzie or her kids then yes address that honestly and what the solution is.  It also depends on their age and maturity. I never said you should lie to them. [/quote]

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