Reply to I want out of this marriage. I want to scream

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Step One - get your career going again and get a nanny that helps with the kids.  See if it helps the marriage - if it doesn't, then at least you will be ready to stand on your own two feet[/quote]

This is the most sane advice, rather than trying to sparkle yourself up into a gem he can't afford to lose, get your career back.

He's an ass to say he's the best you can do. It's also kind of gaslighty since he had to woo you in the first place. 
[/quote]

OP here. DH earns around 2m per year. We were both graduate students when we started dating. He was humble and kind, hardworking and had lots of potential. Now he is a self important prick.[/quote]

I feel for you, OP. What is preventing you from hiring help and doing some things - whether work or something else - that brings you personal happiness? Your overall dynamic might shift if you have your own sense of self and happiness. And to all of the "power" posters - he must realize that you can leave and take half of his wealth, no? [/quote]

I have part time help. DH told me to hire full time help so he isn’t burdened with helping.

I have mentioned going back to work and he has previously shot it down saying I won’t make enough to make it worth our while. I don’t care how much I earn. I am going to work part time at least.

He has been nice to me today. He can sense when I’m super pissed vs normal mad.[/quote]

[b]Your husband is right that going back to work is not worth it. If he makes that kind of money, it is all going to go to taxes. [/b]Do you want to work for free? Why don’t you think of turning a hobby into a business? I think you should recognize that a lot of people are in your shoes with a lot less money. He is right that he is probably the best you can do. He probably should not have said that, but even I recognize in my own marriage that it is the truth and my husband makes a fraction of what yours does. I suggest you get some fulfillment beyond kids and start doing regular date nights.[/quote]

no, it's not all going to taxes. part of her salary is going to taxes, and part of his salary is going to taxes. but she is still making her own money, even if household income remains the same.

besides, looking at work soleley through the lens of money is stupid, especially for someone like OP. she needs to build a career, not work as a cashier at walmart. it will be difficult and take time but lack of challenges is precisely one of the things that make OP's life so empty and boring. life can, indeed, be too comfortable. work is more than money, it's about accomplishment, respect, socializing and more.[/quote]

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