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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have one girl and one boy (teens) and they’re both awesome.

What’s so bad with boys now? My guess would be video game addiction is a big problem, but also [b]we have taken away a lot of opportunities for them to problem solve. There’s not as much free range sand lot games where the entire neighborhood showed up and they handled conflicts and scraped knees. Now it’s travel baseball teams and a ton of parent oversight. Less risk-taking. Fewer opportunities to fail because we are all so scared to let them make their own mistakes because college is so much harder to get into these days. [/b]

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THIS is what is the issue with kids now - WAY too much oversight, management, helicoptering and snowplowing of elementary and middle school kids so that they can't manage themselves by high school.  But that's true for GIRLS AND BOYS.  [/quote]

This this this.  Kids aren’t given the opportunity to develop the “grit” that comes from not getting something right the first time (or second or third) and still getting up and trying again.  So many parents are also not keeping their kids in activities that they are just mediocre at - there’s something character building about being on a track team or a swim team and coming in at the middle or bottom of the pack and still showing up to practices and meets.

My kid is in martial arts, and to advance past a certain level, there’s a pre-test.  She, and most of her cohort, failed the pre-test the first time.  They all got tips, worked on it, and came back and passed the next time.  It was tough that first time, but made the “win” so much sweeter.

The only reason I can think of that it doesn’t appear to impact girls the same way is once girls hit 11/12 their self-confidence goes down and they start thinking they need to keep everything together and are like ducks furiously peddling their feet under water, so they are putting in the work - but that leads to anxiety and perfectionism, rather than just giving up. [/quote]

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