Reply to MIL and her "alone time" with DH

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here... my MIL is crazy and my husband absolutely won't stand up to her. I feel excluded and sad for my child. When I plan outings for the family when she visits she always changes the plans so it's just her and my husband and me and my son excluded. My mother doesn't do this with my siblings and their spouses. I don't know the area well where she lives and it's totally suburban and nothing within walking distance and she insists my son drive in case they won't to go somewhere because god forbid he should drive her car. She makes no effort to spend time w me or my son. I'm dreading thanksgiving and her alone time while I take my son on a walk around suburbia for 4 hours. She is selfish and I'm glad others think this is strange too. My husband for some odd reason is utterly terrified of his mother and would never disobey her. She would DIE if he showed up w our child as our son is relegated to the kitchen only of her house and backyard not the front.[/quote]

Here's what I don't understand. How do you go from

[i]MIL is crazy. MIL is selfish. DH is terrified of her.[/i]

[i]I feel excluded and sad for my child.[/i]

?????????????????

If MIL is crazy, selfish, and scary, shouldn't you be GLAD to be excluded? And GLAD your DS won't be exposed to her so much?

It sounds like you wish MIL were somebody else, who would love your DS and want to spend time with him, who would love you and include you in everything. But she's not that person. She is, by your own assessment, crazy and selfish and scary. She is who she is. Consider your time away from a crazy, selfish, and scary person as a gift. Because that is what it is.

The one thing I would put my foot down about is being left without a car. Any plan that leaves you stranded at a hotel with a kid for 4 hours in the middle of day is a non-starter. Tell DH he is not taking the car. You will drop him off or he can uber. Period.[/quote]

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