Reply to SIL getting remarried but no humility re 2nd wedding

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "SIL getting remarried but no humility re 2nd wedding"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just let her know that your not available to participate as a bridesmaid but are looking forward to attending (or send your regrets).   Other than that, it is absolutely none of your business how to other people choose to celebrate their marriage?   Your views, your expectations, your preferences, they're all wholly irrelevant.   And given how little you seem to think of her, I am sure she is not a fan of yours either. If you don't go, I am doubtful it will break her heart, or that she would even notice.   Not everyone needs to get along and be the closest of friends. Treating each other civilly, being respectful, and not trash talking family members behind their backs, though, would seem to be a pretty basic set of expectations. Why don't you just try living up to that very, very low bar? [/quote]

Wholly irrelevant? Nope. Where the SIL and BIL go on their honeymoon is wholly irrelevant, because it has nothing to do with her.

The wedding has to do with the OP because she's getting asked to fund a portion of it. If and when she respectfully declines to participate, she'll have to deal with the annoyance of begrudged relatives. It's annoying. It's not the end of the world. OP and those of us who think these things are classless have a right to be irritated at the request to participate. Much like you have a right to be annoyed by a relative who wants a second baby shower. "Hey, you don't have to host it!" "You don't have to go!" Yep, we understand. We still have a right to our own thoughts about classless behavior. [/quote]

OP is an adult.  She can go, or not go, completely her choice.  And if by having to "deal with" letting other relatives down, you are making a lot of assumptions. That other relatives care, that other relatives expect the OP to care,  and that adults in the normal course of their days aren't expected to engage in basic social decision-making, and that people don't regularly find ways to politely, and concisely, different conversations away from these topics.  as for having the OO pay for her wedding, I don't think that is what the bride is doing. She has invited someone to serve in a role costs money in terms of a dress, etc. If the person doesn't want to, so what?  If the OP can't manage these basic social situations, she should learn.  Pretty basic.

I, for one, really like second weddings.  I've been to many, ranging widely in formality and involvement.  It's a celebration of two people in love, for goodness sake, and I love celebrating it with friends and family.  I'm happily married to my first DH so I don't see a second wedding in my future.  If I were to marry again, though, I'd hope that anyone with OP's views would just have the good sense to RSVP regrets.  Who wants to deal with such a downer at a celebration?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics