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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
I'm the PP that PP is responding to.  I disagree that it's an issue of variety.  I think PP kind of misses my point in that regard.  The issue isn't monogamy.  The issue is that the woman just isn't sexually attracted to her husband but likes him as a husband for many other reasons -- earning potential, stability, calm demeanor, genuine friendship.  The problem is that while the woman may like or even love her husband, she isn't sexually attracted to him (or is no longer sexually attracted to him), but she doesn't want to admit it.  So she deludes herself and her husband that she just isn't as interested in sex anymore or that there is something else -- there must be something else -- wrong.  That's why you see the posts from men who say at first she said it's chores, then it's kids, then it's the job, then it's something else, but as much as he does to relieve those other things, the problem never gets better.  Not necessarily in all, but in many cases (at least what I have observed from women I know and what they have told me), the real problem is they just aren't sexually attracted to their husbands. What leads me to that conclusion?  The way they talk about other men or fantasize (men they know IRL or men in the movies).  It seems clear to me that they have a sex drive.  It's just not their husbands that get it going.  But in all cases, they swear up and down that their slim to nil sex life with their husbands is because of low libido. [b] I don't even think they're lying to their husbands.  I think they're lying to themselves. [/b] The problem is that the husband then bends over backward to watch the kids, help with chores, and so on and so on.  
[/quote]

That's it, in a nutshell.  And it explains the vitriol from the DCUM chorus when anyone suggests the same thing you assert above: [b]"the real problem is they just aren't sexually attracted to their husbands"[/b]

Ironically, other women may very well be attracted to the same man for whom his wife has so little interest.  [/quote]

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