Reply to Ex husband and wife throwing a birthday party for our child

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You should go. Are you not going to be there on graduation days, wedding days or when your grandchildren are being born? You just need to suck it up and paint a smile on your face. [/quote]

As an adult kid of divorced parents this is right. My parents could not be in the same place for 2 hours for birthdays, graduations and my other big life events. My dad attended my HS and college graduations, but sat alone and left before I saw him after the ceremony. My mother threw my wedding, and refused to put my dad's name on the invite as "daughter of."  My dad threw my sister's and until the last minute my mom refused to attend. Once I was married, I instituted the everyone is welcome but only if they can get along rule (20 years post divorce, BTW).  My kids aren't going to have to deal with the crap they put me through. They can't, and have never been able to spend a Christmas morning with their grandkids or attend a grandchild birthday party. The tone you set now will determine what kind of relationship you end up having with your DD-- and her DD. It's been 6 years. Your Ex is extending an olive branch. Meet him halfway and try.  Next big event, you throw the party and send him and his new wife an invite.  Part of parenting is putting your kid first and doing things that suck. She will appreciate it one day, and it will pay long term dividends. [/quote]

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