Reply to MIL hurt my dog and I want to disown her

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]Oh first, you need to realize that this is your child's grandmother and your DH's mother.  That is an important relationship for both of them to have regardless of how you feel about her.[/b]  It doesn't mean you have to have a relationship with her but it means that you need to leave them to have their own.

Honestly, as a dog lover, I would have probably pushed the dog off also.  We don't allow our dogs on the furniture (and never understand why others do) so my instinct would have been to correct the dog while not even thinking about what I was doing.

I am also positive after having dogs with torn ACLs and hip dysplasia that your dog should be trained gently to not jump up onto any furniture.  Do this now so that no further damage is done (which can be done simply getting on and off furniture) but also for post op when your dog should not be doing this at all.[/quote]

If MIL is abusive and crazy (and she is!), then it is an important relationship for the grandchildren to avoid. We don't spend much time with my abusive, mentally ill MIL for exactly that reason. She wrecked my DH's childhood and young adulthood.  He has nothing good to say about her as a parent.  Why on earth would we allow her to have a major role in our children's lives?[/quote]

You're projecting. [/quote]

No, I don't think I am.  If you've ever been around people with borderline personality disorder, you know what it looks like.  It looks like this.  MIL was told not to push the dog and did it anyway.  When OP was justifiably mad that her dog was pushed and hurt, MIL did not apologize. Instead, she headed off into a tirade about how DIL loves the dog more than her.  That's how borderlines react to criticism. Even the slightest little bit of criticism is interpreted as a statement that they are unloved and unlovable. They become afraid and threatened that they will be abandoned. They throw a big hissy fit and storm out, rejecting you before you can reject them.

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