Reply to Please explain Southern-style communication to a clueless Yankee

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My 2 cents:

Southerners are raised in what was traditionally the Bible Belt. Christian values are reflected in communications. I was taught if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything. But sometimes people still look at you and expect an answer. Which explains phrases like "bless their heart".  Bringing food to the sick, and compassion for those struggling or less fortunate is a value also instilled.  Concern for others was the main focus of my upbringing, also a Chrisitan value.  While these are valid for any Christian, I'd have to say from observances that the main focus on helping others more than one's self may be just a Southern thing, and is probably dwindling in the South as well.  My dad, from the North holds the same values as my mother who's a Southerner.  He focuses on enjoying life, and my mother has always focused on helping and being kind to others in her actions and speech.  He focuses on entertaining and enjoying people.  Wish someone could tell me what the Northern culture focuses on when raising children with Christian values.  As I said, I feel like the values are the same, but maybe the focus communicated is very different.[/quote]

I'll try to explain what the North instills when raising someone with Christian values - I'm a Christian from the Northern California/Sacramento area who attended Christian school there and sent my daughter to Christian school.

I guess a good first guess would be the blunt honesty everyone is talking about here.  I grew up taking things at face value and presenting things at face value to others, for the most part.  I remember my mother also teaching me that Christianity was about what we believed in our heart, not how we dressed, how often we attended church, or how we presented to others.  My brother, as a result, is a Christian man but has a fowl mouth and a biting sense of sarcastic humor.  I worship but do so privately and rarely make it to church.

I knew some people in my husband's family that were Pentecostals from the South and my, was that a culture shock.  They pretended to be friendly when they really weren't, and had rules I considered odd, such as having to wear long skirts and not cut their hair.  I remember one time I was (trying to be) nice to someone and bought them a calling card, which seriously pissed them off.  Really, I didn't get what they were upset about, but I think they perceived it as me not thinking they could take care of themselves, or something.[/quote]

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