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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Another perspective.  I was once young and single, working 12+ hours, often 6 days a week.  And taking classes at night.  And dating/going out with friends.  I had no interest in kids, no interest in anything domestic if it involved more than ordering a pizza.  I was single, I had no kids but that did not mean that I was not busy. [b] I would never have offered to be a back up sitter to someone else's kids. [/b] Trust me, I was the wrong person for the job at that stage in my life.  I'm guessing that may be what is going on with this BIL.

He may feel capable of hanging out with the guys (or guy) during his down time but he really doesn't want to spend his time off helping out someone else.

As it turns out, I wound up becoming a wife and mom and now I totally understand how hard it can be to be responsible for kids 24/7 - and my husband has never deployed!  I hope you can find another mom to help you next time.  Hugs.[/quote]

The bolded part is the key difference.  The BIL DID offer.[/quote]

And maybe if he had come through for Op, Op would be more agreeable to having him over more often.  But he didn't come through and they do not have that type of warm relationship (his choice).  So BIL needs to respect the fact that Op doesn't want him hanging around in her house all the time, ignoring her and eating her food (and making more work for Op).  [/quote]

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