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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I didn't read the thread, but I can tell you as the wife who did become fat and I'm sure my exH would have said I was lazy, I wasn't. I was miserable in a marriage, depressed, unhappy, I had lost sense of who I was as a woman, as a wife, I felt utterly helplessly miserable. And he was the reason. He was so mentally abusive and withholding, I had no idea at the time. For me though, I did go to the gym, and I did try and it didn't work. But for him, he'd put me down. He'd say I wasn't training hard, and I wasn't eating small enough. As he'd devour an entire pizza, alone and remain a super skinny guy. LONG story short, when we divorced, I lost 75 pounds. Without even trying. Because my inner woman was no longer put down, shamed, criticized. I was desired by others, I felt pretty, and my body just started responding. I think if she's depressed, she can feel your judgement and it's not helping. If you really do love her, I'd make her feel pretty, I'd go on walks with her as "dates" so you don't put her down. I'd get her a gorgeous lingerie set. I'd make her feel loved and desirable. If that doesn't work, then that is on her. But don't underestimate the value of feeling awful, and sensing your spouse feels that way about you too. [/quote]

In other words: you got fat, he wasn't turned on anymore, you get resentful over his loss of attraction, downward spiral into divorce.
Then you realize that fat women don't get many dates, so you lose the weight in order to find the next guy.
I've seen this cycle SO many times, it's amazing how much weight comes off the weeks following divorce !!

Guess what? Clearly you COULD lose the weight, because you did.
And clearly you KNEW that the extra weight hurt your desirability with men.
But despite both the knowledge and ability, you just (stubbornly) would not do that while married.
And you hated your H for being so shallow as to tell you the truth.

I can totally see my wife (40+ pounds overweight and gaining) pulling this exact same trick.
I've not yet spoken up, but I am almost to the point of turning all Shes-Fat-And-Lazy on her.
And I can predict the outcome: she'll cop a resentment; we will divorce; she'll lose 50 pounds in a few months.

Please answer me: why do women pull this crap?[/quote]

Yes!  And then she will happily start fucking someone else, someone who doesnt get resentful and crazy!! Don't you love how that happens?   :mrgreen: [/quote]
...until she gets fat again. Repeat cycle. [/quote]

Unless the new guy is MUCH better in bed and keeps her on her toes. :P [/quote]

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