Reply to When the kids go to college, I'm out of this loveless and affectionless marriage

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Reply to "When the kids go to college, I'm out of this loveless and affectionless marriage"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]When a spouse does not want sex and there is only low level conflict in the marriage, there are only three options

1. Suffer. Morally miserable and you feel dead inside and outside.

2. Divorce. Moral but the kids may suffer from single parenting or rotation between parents. If a child has some medical condition this maybe in-feasible. If the marriage is high conflict then it is probably the best choice.

3. Cheat. In-moral,  high risk if caught.

Each option is bad. [/quote]

If I were the low drive spouse in a low conflict, otherwise happy marriage, I would tell my spouse to have discreet physical affairs. I mean, if I didn't want sex, what would it hurt me? Better to let them get it elsewhere than destruct a family and an otherwise agreeable existence because I won't have sex and am too prideful to allow an affair. I think I would ask that they keep it discreet so that I and our friends don't know, and keep it purely physical so it doesn't detract from our family life. That's a good option #4. There is a chance of the spouse leaving you for the AP but there's a decent chance if the spouse leaving you in the other scenarios as well. Might as well try a compromise. [/quote]

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