Reply to SIL announced her pregnancy just a few hours after DC's birth

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Reply to "SIL announced her pregnancy just a few hours after DC's birth"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Have not read all the posts, and OP may have added info, but this reminded me of posts Ive read on the "family living with narcissist" support groups.

In and of itself such behavior seems like not a big deal, but OP may have an instinctive context we dont know about- a sense that this was weird, and the energy of it was weird in the moment. Ive read posts about narcissists finding ways to insert themselves on moments such as a baby having been born and deflect the moment with something as random as sending someone important on an errand.  Its hard to explain, but the context is everything.

OP may have had one of those "s** that was.....weird...why exactly...?" moments. My father married a narcissist after my mom died, and believe me, its a very twisted and strange experience. It can hide in plain view and people who "see" it are usually told the person is being nice or gracious. They are usually charming and are expert manipulators.[/quote]

OP here. I'm close to the family and this is absolutely true. SIL is definitely a narcissist. My friend has suffered a lot and I can totally relate to the "only some people see it" and the vast majority thinking it's no big deal and some even think SIL is amazing, gracious, devoted martyr, generous, etc.

I feel bad for my friend but I'm trying to help her let go of it and focus on her little guy.  [/quote]

People throw that term "narcissist" around a lot these days.  SIL may also just be a bit needy and insecure, wanting approval.  That's more a sign of immaturity and a lack of grace than it is of a personality disorder.  It's annoying and, yes, it is nice that you are helping your friend to move past this.  [/quote]

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