Reply to DW Needs to Put on Her Big Girl Pants and Be an Adult

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Reply to "DW Needs to Put on Her Big Girl Pants and Be an Adult"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As for your career, if you're this far along in years and can't manage to work your way past these hardship posts, that's your own failing and perhaps, rightly or wrong, she expected better.[/quote]

PP, out of curiosity, are you FS or military?  Do you really think it works this way?  You do your best to bid on the posts that are best for your family and your career needs, but the "needs of the service" will always come first.  It is a hard balancing act sometimes.  However, I feel DW never really thinks about the exact characteristics of a post of assignment she wants, i.e. am a I willing to trade off a cushy place in Western Europe for a hardship assignment with good schools and great job opportunities, or do I should want to laise around the post going shopping, getting my manicure done, etc.  If DW tells me that employment is her priority, then I think she should be looking with me at the posts with good employment opportunities and not so much focused on a Paris or a Rome that has none.

And, FWIW, I have made decisions for years now that were what she wanted and it generally hasn't helped in the getting promoted and moving up category.  
[/quote]

Yes, I am from a military family.  My husband is now retired and in the private sector here.  He was  ery successful in the mitary and is  ow as well.  Did multiple stints at DoD at the Pentagon even though he didn't join to be a "desk jockey."  I was always willing to put his career first, and he always, always expressed appreciation for that very, very generous gift.  If you are lucky enough to have found a spouse willing to tolerate you having a career that is, really, totally self -absorbed, count yourself lucky and give her a break whenever you can.  My guess, though, is that she already has one foot out the door.[/quote]

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