Reply to Why its almost always women putting partner's career ahead of their own

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I just dont care that much about work. I do a good job (and sometimes a great job) but I dont need validation from my employer or to feel happy/fulfilled by my job. IF I wanted a high-paying or intense career then I would have not married or had children. Its not about my husband or his career. I dont have the bandwidth to do both. I would be totally fine with working Trader Joe's stock or checkout line if it paid enough for the lifestyle we have.

I had a delay with finishing college and by my later mid-20s when I completed my undergrad it was try for the MD/PhD route or not. I knew if I started that path then there wouldnt be time/energy for anything else- mostly because of my own shortcomings in energy levels and sleep needs. I also didnt want to have kids and then outsource all of their childrearing and I dont have involved parents so it wasnt going to be family looking after them.

Regardless of my husband's career, if we divorced, I would have the same career. I might pick up another low-key job PT, but the rat race is not for me. Sometimes its just not that deep. I want to be a present parent and wife and a more intense career would make it very difficult (for me, personally) to manage since I have some hyperfocus issues. I would resent the constant feeling of never being able to mindfully be where I am.

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Amazing how many women don't take financial responsibility for themselves and their children.[/quote]

Im sorry- from my post, how did you sum that I dont take financial responsibility for myself and children? Please provide detailed explanation with figures. Oh wait, you cant because your knee jerk reaction is that because I dont care, I dont contribute financially... I do. 45% of the family income and I provide the health insurance (which is better than my husbands fed plan and cheaper). What I detailed was that my husband's career isnt first because I put it ahead of mine, my career is second to my family in priority. If I wanted a career to be first, I would not have had a family.  [/quote]

Yes, my “knee jerk” reaction is that because you don’t care about work and think it’s about validation, that you do not place enough priority on your financial responsibility. [/quote]

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