Reply to DH wants to pay for his older sister’s intervention and inpatient rehab

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]His older sister is in mid-50’s and he suspects opioid addiction.  She does not work and has never worked full-time as long as we’ve been married (16 years). We suspect she has been paying for her lifestyle from an accident settlement a while ago, but think the money is running out, as she has been late making her apartment payments the last few years (as evidenced by one eviction and now numerous proceedings from the apartment company against her).

He looked into doing an intervention which will cost $10k flat.  But when I asked him how much the rehab would cost, he could not say.  I just did a quick google search and it says anywhere from $6k-$50k out of pocket.

I’m fuming as I have literally worked since before I was 16, took out student loans, paid them off, live financially conservatively and responsibly.  Meanwhile his sister has coasted, had her college tuition paid for from their parents, barely worked as long as I have known her.  I agreed with him that we could help pay for her intervention, but he should at least look at the cost for rehab before committing to anything.  Also their mother is living, retired (also never worked a day in her life), lives in a nice paid off condo, drives a Mercedes.  I asked DH about her contribution to paying for her daughter and he seems to not want to broach it with her.

I’ve always known his sister would someday be an issue, but wasn’t expecting this sort of financial burden.  Originally I was thinking DH and I could just split our finances, but the more I think about it, the more I realize I don’t want to be in a marriage with separate finances, and this is a deal-breaker for me.  [/quote]

Have you considered befriending, partying with her, and enabling her to find her ultimate limit? 
It's like taking your elderly parents skydiving and motorcycling. [/quote]

lol. [/quote]

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