Reply to Close friend had a party and didn't invite me. How do you deal with the hurt feelings?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This happened to me not so long ago.  It really sent me down a shame spiral.    But I got out of it in part by thinking about Mel robbins’ let them theory.   Look it up — she even talks about being left out of a mom vacation as an example.   The person who left me out is decently friendly to me still and I just react as I would to a casual friend.  Definitely never said anything about the party an never will.  [/quote]

Op here. Thank you! I will not be saying anything about the party if she calls me.

To another PP who asked what milestone event - it was their anniversary party. I guess that's why I felt hurt - that the new friends were invited and us left out. If this was a casual party I would not have cared because everyone cannot be invited to every party. I honestly don't know why she even bothered to call me just a few days prior. This was definitely not an oversight. She asked my what my weekend plans were.

Our spouses are friends too, kids are friends even if different ages.

What threw me off was we had invited her family just a few months ago and everything seemed fine. We have been chatting a lot by phone too since then.

[/quote]

what did you say your plans were? [/quote]

I said we had no real plans so will be doing some clean up in the house.

[/quote]

Did you ask her what her plans were? [/quote]

Op here. Of course I did. She said she had no plans either and was catching up on errands.

I feel hurt because she said this and then had this party.

[/quote]

Hmm well she sucks then. Seriously. I posted earlier to let it go etc... but if she literally flat out lied to you what a b. I have had to not invite friends to events where the list was dictated by my kids' friends and then I invited their friends and their parents and not my closest friends but this does not sound like that. I thought maybe she called to see if you were available and maybe you said you had plans but if she asked you and you said you had no plans then she didn't invite you and then STILL said she had no plans then she sort of sucks!

Last resort question I can think of that may redeem her is 1. Her older kids planned the party and she did not make up the list (yes we did that in highschool for my parents) 2. Husband planned it and made up list to surprise her

If neither of these things then yes she sucks as a friend and I suggest you don't mention it and keep it friendly with her but know that she did this and start to look for other friends that are better. [/quote]

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