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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I also think sometimes couples just have very different needs and perceptions of whether a marriage is "happy" or not. I have friends who are now getting divorced who were married for three decades. She thinks they were happy and is baffled. He thinks he's been unhappy for at least two of the last three decades and stayed because of the kids. They both agree marriage was mostly sexless. She thought that was fine and they were both okay with it. He thought it was not fine and he was lonely. She thought he was easygoing because he always let her get her way. He thought she was controlling because she got pissed off when he did not do what she wanted.

I think both of them have crappy communication skills and took each other for granted: it's like they never actually sat down and had a conversation about what they each wanted and needed, what was working, what was not. Maybe they could have made it a good and enduring marriage if they had talked about those things decades ago. They're both decent people. I don't think either of them hates the other or behaved abusively or badly. I think they just somehow managed to go through decades of marriage without actually talking about what they wanted. Which is mind-blowing.

So now she is shocked and mad and he is relieved to be out but wracked by guilt. I suspect they will both get over it and they will each find someone better suited. I just hope they have both become learned some lessons during the process. I definitely don't think they should have stayed together, though: the marriage was built on a set of mutual false assumptions. [/quote]

Obviously you know these people and I don’t, but I think women who never have sex with a willing husband are either extremely stupid or don’t care about their husband’s happiness and then express “confusion” to their friends as a cover when their husbands leave.  Have these women never met a man?  Why on earth do they think their husbands would be happy with no sex?  They actually don’t care about the person they are living with or are too stupid to be married. [/quote]

A study was done on this and it's because the men are mean to their wives. The study wasn't even to find why women were not having sex, the study was to find a drug like Viagra. In the end, the researchers said "there is not drug on earth that will help women have sex with an a-hole".

If your wife isn't having sex look in the mirror. [/quote]

LOL. Another woman spouting off about how they are all blameless.[/quote]

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