Reply to How much $$ are the Grooms parents expected to contribute to wedding costs?

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Reply to "How much $$ are the Grooms parents expected to contribute to wedding costs?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am the South Asian poster.  We started saving for our own retirement and college for two kids - from our first jobs, before we even got married.  It was forced frugality and in some ways, I resented seeing my money go in what seemed like the black hole of savings and investment.

The whole paying for weddings, paying for 1st new sedan, paying for set up of first apartment and first professional wardrobe, helping with downpayment to first real estate purchase etc...this started happening when our savings and investments - compounded. All of these are frosting on the cake. The main investment was only for retirement and state college. [/quote]

$350 k for a wedding? What in the world is your income? Is there an expectation now that DIL will provide care for you as you get older? [/quote]

Ufff...this was a happy and emotional spending by a doting South Asian father for his only DD.    This money for our kids weddings have been saved all our lives, even before we had children.  But, if we had needed it for retirement, college, medical needs, housing or helping anyone in our extended family - we would have used it for that. We are not stupid and we know the value of money.

My kids and their spouses need to look after their own families and start saving money, start investing money and start planning for their kids.   The financial leg-up only works if the beneficiaries use it to get ahead.

I cannot imagine having my DIL take care of us. It is not her responsibility. She needs to take care of her parents.  Our biological children may need to one day provide oversight and supervision for our care. But I cannot imagine them actively, physically or financially taking care of us.  I hope by the time we need care, there will be AI powered robots who could do the elderly care stuff. [/quote]

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