Reply to What percentage of married couples do you think are unfaithful?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’ve understood about the mundanity and frequency of infidelity since I was a preteen - that’s when I became my mother’s confidant and got to hear in detail about all the infidelities in marriages on both sides of my family, as well as in the marriages of neighbors and friends - my mother was the kind of woman people opened up to and I guess she wanted me to know from the start that the idea of fidelity was nice but all too rare in practice.

From the time I was a teenaged waitress and through my university and law school years and in my career which included regular travel for professional conferences and trainings, I have been approached dozens of times by married men or men otherwise in committed relationships looking to get some strange on the side. Ironically despite my mother’s efforts to educate me on the commonality of extramarital affairs, I found the whole idea répugnant and would never engage with anyone I suspected of being married - although I’m sure in my years of sexual exploration I probably had at least one affair with someone I didn’t realize was married or committed.

In my life as an attorney in family and criminal law I’ve seen tons of evidence of marital betrayals that endure for years before the secret gets out to the one being betrayed. Most interesting is that in some cases it’s an open secret in a small community and might even involve out of wedlock children and everyone kind of knows except the spouse whose head is buried deeply in denial.

I’m not arguing that I’m a wholly healthy person, but I do think my choice to stay single for the vast majority of my life based on my understanding of the fickleness of love combined with all the sacrifices marriage requires especially of women is not at all an unhealthy one. I’ve seen others devastated by infidelity and it is something I would never want to endure myself so I simply avoid the possibility.[/quote]

This was an interesting post.  Do you ever fall in love?[/quote]

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