Reply to Who holds the power in the marriage dating market?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]When I was in my 20s I could basically get any man to date me. But once in a relationship, they were all pretty focused on their career goals and couldn't think of settling down in a few years, even talking about it. [url]I would've had to be a "waity Katie" type until they were ready[/url]. Some of my exboyfriends settled down in their 30s and some never did settle down or have kids at all. I don't think men want marriage or family as much as women.

I ended up settling with someone at 27 and knew I was settling but I was so over the wishy-washy noncommittal men that I missed a lot of red flags in regards to personality. I suppose I was what I would now call "love bombed." At the time I thought, oh this is what it's like to be pursued, to not have to question commitment. But he ended up an extremely controlling husband.[/quote]

This is how a lot of women end up single in their 30s. Waiting out men getting their career started or in school and then it doesn’t work out.[/quote]

This forum is full of stories about men with “potential” who turned out to be duds. Many get laid off and are in no hurry to find work—but aren’t interested in the dreary work of caring for young children either.

That’s why women wait.[/quote]

Yes, but if you wait, those men have a much larger dating pool than they did when you first met them.  In our early 40s, my husband is a "DCUM catch" - tall, good looking, high earner but not a workaholic, involved in family life - but he wasn't yet all of those things when we met 20 years ago.  He was a broke student like I was.  I like to think we'd have still ended up together if we'd met 10 years later (I think I'm a catch, too!) but who knows... his dating pool at 30-35 was basically everyone which was not the case when we met.[/quote]

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